SportsThoughtsEngland Back at Route One (LINK)
Big man, little man up front. Four-four-two, play it into the channels, get the ball into the box. It’s the football England used to be famous for playing, until Graham Taylor’s disastrous reign, after which the public rose up and demanded a more expansive style. Since then, the English public have demanded a modicum of refinement from the national team. And why not? English players have improved technically in leaps and bounds over the past twenty years. Why shouldn’t they play with a bit more finesse?
But the injury/suspension crisis prior to the last round of international games necessitated the call-up of a bunch of sloggers, most notably Emile Heskey, and a switch to direct, attacking football. The result: the most assured performances of MacLaren’s reign, six points, and a bagful of ugly/beautiful goals.
Perhaps the time has come to go back to the future, and forget all this foreign sophisticated football rubbish Maybe it’s time England got back to what they do best: winning ball in midfield and hoisting it straight up to the giant in the box, and letting a little man feed off the resulting mayhem.
Being an advocate of ‘direct’ football today carries the same sort of shame as being a Junior Tory
member. Still, considering how badly this team plays when they are trying to be clever, and how well route-one worked against Russia, it’s probably their best bet.
The Pharoh’s Guide to New Route One:
4-4-f**king -2
* Defenders only defend. Full-backs don’t pass midfield. They play the ball direct into the channels for strikers/wingers to chase.
* Two fast wingers on the flanks. (Lennon/Agbonlahor/other and Rooney, since there’s no-one any good to play left wing). Have wingers shot if they do not deliver high-percentage ball into the box 50% of the time they receive it out wide.
* Crouch or Heskey plays every game. Owen /Defoe/Johnson plays with them.
* Attack corners/set pieces mercilessly. Only full-backs and one winger back. Emphasis on set-pieces in training.
* Feed players human blood before each game.
* Invent a haka to be performed before each game. This should be based on dances done by patrons coming out Liverpool nightclubs at four in the morning.
Bring back the glory days of Alan Smith, Carlton Palmer and Ruel Fox, that’s what I say!
